Health Anxiety - The Most Underrated Health Crisis
Anxiety.
It’s trendy.
It’s joked about.
It’s spoken about so nonchalantly.
And it’s very real.
I first got into the work that I’m doing on accident. I got into this work because this was the work that I needed.
I’ve struggled with my health for most of my life. It’s the same story that you’ll hear so many other people share. You don’t know what’s wrong. No one else does either. All of your tests look great. Western medicine doesn’t help you so you try alternative modalities. They’re good, but not great enough to eradicate your health issues completely. You keep peeling back the onion day after day after day while being so very tired of it all. You just want to be better.
What is often so overlooked in that circumstance and in the healing space is the aspect of health induced anxiety.
Health anxiety, illness anxiety disorder. Whatever you want to call it, I don’t really think it needs a name because giving it a name gives it power. And clearly, it already has enough power.
Now there is a lot that goes into the healing of this. You can’t just take a fancy supplement or go to acupuncture and heal it. There is so much more to it than that. And I believe it is the number 1 thing that prevents most people suffering with chronic issues while pursuing alternative modalities from moving the needle.
And so, the million dollar question emerges.
How do you accept the fact that life is fleeting, we are not in control, and your symptoms are your experience in this moment?
The first time I went to the ER for “anxiety” I was driving to work. I had very recently graduated high school. It was super early in the morning. I was about 10 minutes into my 45 minute drive. My lips began to feel puffy. Anxiety started flooding my cells, suffocating every fiber of my being. I turned around and headed home. I thought I was having an allergic reaction even though I had no allergies. My mom took me to the ER where they concluded that I “just had anxiety.”
That was only the beginning. Around this time and the upcoming years resulted in a lot of unanswered questions from doctors. No one could tell what was wrong with me. Why I was so bloated, constipated, experiencing acid reflux, passing out, obsessive, etc. It only spiraled from there into a Lyme diagnosis and even more mystery symptoms.
When no one who is seemingly holding the answers to help improve your experience of existence can help you, things within you shift.
As the years went on I became more and more fearful. I would obsessively search for answers, try new things, see new doctors, and take new supplements all in the name of feeling better and healing.
And yet, I wasn’t healing.
The final straw that broke the camels back was the mold. It put me into the worst place I ever was in with my health and it took health anxiety to a whole new level.
How can you exist in a world where nothing feels safe? How can you feel safe when it seems as if your very body is letting you down by being sick?
Many questions can be asked, but you have to answer them. And if you don’t have the answers (which you probably don’t) then you have to allow themselves to be revealed to you. How do you do that? You sit down with a pen and paper (no phone!!) and you wait for the answer to come. It will come.
This is the hard work, healing the health anxiety. It is the hardest. For a lot of reasons.
It is coming to terms with the fact that you are not feeling safe. It’s recognizing that you need to create that safety. That usually means that you pretty much have to change your entire life so that you can mother that aspect of you back to health. There’s a lot attached to that. It seems harsh and dramatic, but it’s true. Boundaries, or lack thereof. People pleasing. “Should-ing.” Trauma. Attachments. The list goes on and on. It all matters. By working to create safety you have to deconstruct your entire life because there are a lot of aspects of life that contributed to the space that you’re in now.
The deconstruction doesn’t have to happen overnight, but usually, it has to happen.
And with that you can (should) also incorporate nature. Nature is your greatest healer and teacher. Let her guide you. Fall asleep with the sun and awake with it too. Plant your feet on the earth. Look at flowers. Watch things grow. Sit by water, or get in it. Marvel at the amazingness of the natural world. Slow down and watch. It is much more healing than that new article that Dr. Google just downloaded for you.
Remove what you need, bit by bit. Allow yourself to create space within. And then, fill that space with nature. Fill it with natures guidance. Bit by bit, day by day, it will lead the way.
I think that a lot of this stuff is easy and we just make it hard. A bold statement, yes, but I believe it to be true from my experience with all of this. We let our emotions get in the way. We let our fears drive the car. We question things. We don’t trust God.
You can have control over your emotions and fears. You can separate yourself from them and choose differently. They will still come quickly and show themselves, but with practice you can quickly take over the drivers seat and redirect the car. You can reignite that connection with God and nurse that trust back to health.
You can. You can. You can.
You are so powerful. You are so attuned with the natural world. Neither may feel true right now but I promise that they are within you just awaiting their awakening.
